How to Win at Everything

by The Grrrl

Title: How To Win At Everything

Author: The Grrrl

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Archive: Ask first.

Fandom: Stargate Atlantis

Pairing: Sheppard/McKay

Summary: John plays to win.

Rodney returned to his seat, handing John a beer before setting his own beside the chess board. "All right then. Prepare for defeat, Sheppard." He rubbed his hands together in glee, grinning as he eyed the board. His tactics were working, he had John on the run, and he was so going to win.

"Whatever you say, Rodney." John leaned back in his chair and sipped his beer.

"I say you are going down in flames." Rodney picked up his rook. "Get ready to cry and wring your hands--what the hell?" His hand stilled. Frowning, he looked over the pieces. Something wasn't right. He glanced up, eyes narrowed. "I don't believe you."

"What?" John asked, all wide-eyed innocence.

"Don't give me 'what'."

John shrugged. "Come on, make your move."

Rodney put his rook back down. "Put it back."

"Put what back?"

"Your king."

"What king?"

"The black king you took from the board."

"A black king?" Heaving a put-upon sigh, John sat up and studied the board, his expression quizzical. "I don't think I ever had one."

"Oh, you are too much, you know that?" Rodney pointed a stern finger at John. "You just can't stand to lose, can you?"

"I don't know what you mean, Rodney." But now John's lips were twitching, and oh yes, Rodney supposed John thought he was cute, but he wasn't, not even a little, and Rodney wasn't the least bit amused. He had been winning, damn it.

"Know what you are?" Rodney snapped. "You're a cheater. You're a big cheating cheat. Who cheats."

John had the nerve to look hurt. "Am not."

Rodney rose up from his chair. "Where is it, Colonel McCheaty Cheats?"

"Where's what?"

"Your. King." Rodney scowled. "The one you stole from the board."

John's expression grew thoughtful. "But I'm protecting it. Isn't that the object of the game?"

"There are rules, Sheppard." Rodney stalked around the table as John blandly watched. "You can never play by the rules, can you?"

Now John did grin. "Not really."

"It's like you think they don't apply to you. You always think you can cheat, like the big cheating thing you are." Rodney snapped his fingers again. "Hand it over. Now."

"Okay." John rose from in his chair, lifting his hands in surrender. "But you'll have to find it. Or I win."

"Oh, I will find it. Cheater." Rodney grabbed the hem of John's t-shirt and lifted, sliding his hand over the curve of John's belly as he examined the waistband of John's trousers. "You. You're too much. You cheat at everything. Like the race cars."

John squirmed and Rodney tugged him closer, his hand sliding over the small of John's back.

"You steal my money in Monopoly. And my hotels." With John's breath on his cheek, he patted the front pockets of John's trousers. "You make up words in Scrabble."

"Uh huh." John held onto Rodney's shoulders.

Rodney's fingers dipped into John's back pockets. "You probably even cheat at Solitaire."

"All the time." John's voice was low and sultry as he nuzzled Rodney's neck.

"You cheat at," Rodney gasped as John nipped at his skin. "You--"

"Hmmm?" John slipped his hands under Rodney's shirt.

"You cheat--"

John caressed Rodney's skin. "Death?" he suggested helpfully.

"That too." Rodney leaned into John's touch, pressing against John's warm, wiry body. "Although that? I don't mind so much."

John chuckled, then his lips were on Rodney's, soft and sweet.

"And you steal kisses." Rodney murmured against John's mouth.


"A cheater and a thief," Rodney said, kissing John again.

"Uh huh." John licked Rodney's lips. "That's why I always win."

"Not this time." Rodney ran his hands over John's ass. "I am finding that king if I have to take all your clothes off to do it."

And he did. He pushed a laughing John down onto the bed and stripped every last item of clothing from John's body. When he found the king tucked away in John's left sock he crowed in triumph because he won damn it.

Then he proceeded to thoroughly enjoy his spoils of victory.

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