by The Grrrl

Title: Secret

Author: The Grrrl

Author's email:

Author's URL:

Archive: Ask first.

Fandom: Stargate Atlantis

Pairing: Sheppard/McKay

Summary: Rodney learns.

It's not that Rodney doesn't like to nap after sex--he does, very much so. But there's something about the way that John sprawls all over the bed, loose-limbed and content, that makes Rodney forget all about sleep. Instead he nuzzles John's shoulder, kisses John's ear, maybe runs a thumb over John's hipbone and the thing is John never seems to mind. He yawns, stretches and shifts closer, which Rodney takes as an invitation to continue.

There are all kinds of interesting places to touch. The skin on the inside of John's wrist is surprisingly delicate, and if Rodney drags his fingertips along it John will shiver and twitch in response, even if he doesn't open his eyes. Rodney likes to play with the trail of hair leading down from John's bellybutton, too, roughing it up with his fingers then smoothing it back down again. Then there is the bump of John's ribs under his skin, the curve of muscles along his chest, the dark nipples and the smooth, hairless circle of skin surrounding them. A fascinating array of textures all right there for Rodney to explore with his fingers, his lips, his tongue and sometimes his entire body, which earns him a soft "Rodney," but John is smiling when he says it.

Still, it's one of the few times in his life when Rodney worries that he's being a nuisance, so now he decides it's time to be more like John and just settle in for a nonchalant, post-coital nap. It's been months, after all. They've had sex plenty of times and Rodney's totally used to it, even though he has yet to figure out how John can unravel him with something as simple as a blowjob.

Closing his eyes, Rodney presses against John's side and exhales, letting his muscles go limp and setting himself up for sleep. Because, hey, sex with John Sheppard--no big deal. Just because John smiles when he's got Rodney's cock in his mouth, or raises a single quizzical eyebrow when Rodney moans--Rodney still doesn't know whether to laugh or come when John does that--there's nothing special about it at all.

So Rodney grunts and arranges his head on John's arm, only to have the arm slip away as John rolls over onto his stomach.

Rodney opens one eye and stares at the long line of John's back before closing his eye again. He's going to go to sleep, even though his fingers are getting twitchy and he knows that the skin on top of John's shoulders is smooth and soft.

Then he hears the soft whisper.


"Hmmm?" When Rodney doesn't get a response, he opens his eyes. "What?"

John shrugs into his pillow. "Nothing. Go back to sleep."

"I wasn't sleeping. You were sleeping."

John nods, but his shoulders remain hunched. He watches Rodney for a moment, then takes Rodney's hand in his before closing his eyes.

His palm is rough and warm. Rodney knows what it feels like to have that hand on his cock, knows what's it's like to have John's hands take him apart and put him back together again. What it feels like when John's hands slide over his chest. Or cup his cheek--John takes kissing very seriously, holding Rodney's face steady as if he needs to get the angle just right.

Rodney rubs his thumb over the back of John's hand. On impulse, he brings their clasped hands to his lips and kisses each hairy knuckle.

Then watches as John's lips curl into a smile.

He kisses John's wrist because it's small and almost dainty, presses his lips to John's forearm, then moves in closer to kiss John's shoulder.

"Rodney," John sighs. He's still smiling.

And then Rodney gets it.

With John's hand still clasped to his chest, Rodney reaches for John's back, fingers trailing across his shoulders. John makes a small noise at his touch, then stretches and rolls his muscles before sinking down further into the mattress, loose and relaxed.

And Rodney continues, fingers circling on John's skin, until John sleeps.

Stargate Atlantis (including all characters and images) is the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. No copyright infringement is intended or should be inferred. This is a nonprofit fan site.

The Grrrl's site is maintained by The Grrrl