Sex, Movies, and Misconceptions

by The Grrrl

Title: Sex, Movies, and Misconceptions

Authors: mmmchelle and the grrrl

Author's email:,

Author's URL:

Archive: Ask first.

Fandom: Stargate Atlantis

Pairing: Sheppard/McKay

Summary: A little slip-up with computer files leads to..well, all sorts of things.

"Rodney, come on," John said, shouldering in to stand next to him. "You said the data was ready."

"Just a minute, Colonel." Rodney turned back to Dr. Biro, datapad cradled in his arm. "Here, this is the problem--"

"Just give it to me, and I'll be out of your hair." John flashed an apologetic smile at Biro.

"Rodney," Zelenka called from across the lab, where he was hunched over a laptop. "You should see this."

"Yes, yes, yes, for god's sake, take a number. There is only one of me, regrettably so." Rodney spun around and scowled at John. "What?"

"The data?"

"Oh, right." He patted down his pockets, and pulled a small flash drive out of one of them. "Here," he said, pressing it into John's outstretched palm.

"Thanks." With a pat to Rodney's shoulder, John left the lab.

The door to his office slid shut, and John removed the cap from the flashdrive, sliding it into the port before bringing the laptop out of hibernation. He had no idea why he was feeling so impatient, except usually Rodney couldn’t wait to give him data on the latest weapons tests.

Clicking on my computer, he located the flash drive and frowned. It was filled with avi files. Maybe Rodney had filmed the tests? He clicked on the first file, waiting while his media player started.

Music - bad, strident rock music came bursting through his speakers. Then the image of scantily clad women--attractive scantily clad women--with big breasts and lots of blond hair appeared. John blinked, and leaned closer to his monitor.

This certainly wasn't the kind of weapons test he was familiar with.

It was porn. Rodney had given him porn.

John grinned.

And it was the kind of porn that didn't waste time with preliminaries. Which seemed Rodney-like in a way. The woman on the screen was joined by a man she promptly began fellating and oh god, was that a shag carpet? Despite the rug, John hardened. There were slurping sounds, and she was taking the cock in front of her in deep, deeper than anyone had ever taken John. He gave his envious cock a squeeze.

Then a second one, because it missed blowjobs. John could sympathize. He missed them too. Which is what prompted the sympathetic stroke.

He closed the file reluctantly, grabbed the flashdrive and started for the lab, then hesitated. There had been quite a few avi files on the drive. Lots of naked women doing porny things. Maybe even to each other. He looked down at the device in his hand, and his cock twitched.

Big, bouncy breasts, or energy bursts and power levels and particle beams.

No contest. The data could wait.

He closed the computer, scooped it up and headed for his quarters.


John set the computer up on his desk, plugged in the flash drive and settled happily into his chair as it booted up. Trust Rodney to bring the essentials with him to another galaxy.

Part of him was curious as to what kind of porn a smart guy like Rodney would enjoy. Really dark and pervy? Or maybe intelligent porn. With a plot. Not that the first one John had seen had had much of a plot.

John clicked on a file at random, his cock hardening in anticipation. Two women, clad only in dainty lacy things, stretched out together on a bed, running their hands over each other's bodies.

"Thank you, Rodney," John murmured, his hand going to his cock.

Maybe he should hold off, watch a couple of the files first, push it until he couldn’t wait any longer. It had been a long time since his jerk off sessions had been accompanied by anything other than his own imagination. Not that he didn't have a good imagination. He did.

But outside stimulation was a good thing.

The two women kissed.

A very good thing.

John unbuttoned his pants with a blissful sigh. He'd take the edge off first. Then he could enjoy the rest of the collection, savor it even.

One of the women lowered her mouth to the other's breast. There was something unbelievably hot about two women together, and Rodney, pervert that he was, got that.

By the time the two were deep in a sixty-nine John had never liked Rodney more. He quickened his strokes, the excitement building as the camera zoomed in for a close up of a glistening pussy, wet fingers sliding inside. A moment later the camera angled up for view of gyrating hips, then over to a smooth, pale stomach and soft rounded breasts with pretty pink nipples.

John groaned, running his palm over the head of his cock, balls drawing in tight.

The camera pulled back to the second woman. She was crouching over the first woman, a shiny glass dildo in her hand.

John gasped and came, grabbing the head of his cock just in time to prevent a mess as his hips pushed forward. "Whoa," he panted. Sweet, blissful release.

He reached for the tissues, checking the computer for any stray splatters - now there was a computer problem he didn't want to have to explain - but luckily, he had caught it in time. A quick cleanup, and then he leaned back, eyes closed.

But the program was still running, and a moan made him open one eye. The sight of the glass dildo moving in and out made him open both. He had to get back to work before someone noticed he was missing. But first he was making copies.


Rodney was only marginally less harried than he'd been earlier, talking with Simpson, while Zelenka stood next to him frowning, clearly waiting for his turn. He was going to have to wait a little longer.

John sidled up to them, standing close to Rodney on the side opposite Zelenka. "Wrong drive," he said, interrupting their conversation.

Rodney's answer was a quick glare. Then he returned to his conversation with Simpson. John didn't even bother trying to follow it. He held up the drive in front of Rodney's eyes. "Wrong drive," he said again, moving it back and forth.

Rodney's jaw dropped and his face turned red just before he snatched the drive from John's hand. "Oh."

The hand holding the drive disappeared into his pocket, and Rodney fished into the opposite pocket with his other hand. He pulled out another drive, examining it before handing it to John.

"Thanks, Rodney," John said with a grin. Then he started toward the door, pausing and turning back after a few steps. "By the way, I made a copy for myself." Rodney turned even redder and John winked at him before turning again and leaving.


Afternoon meetings, review of the actual weapons data, dinner, workout, and finally John was back in his room, computer clutched in his hands.

Time for a little fun.

Not that it wasn't fun watching Rodney's cheeks turn pink whenever John caught his eye.

He sat at his desk, then changed his mind and settled in on his bed instead, kicking off his shoes and piling up the pillows behind his back. Computer on, resting on his thighs, and he called up the first file.

A man and a woman out in sunny field.

The miniskirt and spike heels didn't look very practical for the outdoors.

John shook his head and called up another file, trying to remember the name of the first one he had seen earlier, with the blowjob. He liked blowjobs. He found it on the third try, settling back to watch, fast-forwarding a little when it got repetitive. Not that he fast forwarded much because there was something about a cock moving in and out of a willing mouth that did it for him.

He kept his hands off his cock, determined to let himself get good and hot first.

By the time he finished with the third file, he was ready to proclaim Rodney a god, or at least a man with good taste in porn. There was a fine line between dirty and raunchy and the stuff in Rodney's collection walked it damn well. Well enough that if this one was as good as the others had been John might just have to give in and jerk off.

It was either that or risk losing the buttons on his pants.

Clicking on the next file in the list, he unfastened his pants. He had to put the computer down to wiggle his pants down around his thighs. When he picked it up again, he saw a couple in a tight embrace, kissing. They were already naked --nice ass, with smooth skin -- John liked asses, especially when they were round and firm like that, although he was more of a breast man when it came down to it. He brushed his fingers over the head of his own cock and sighed happily.

The guy then slid down onto his knees, camera zooming in on the large, erect penis he was about to suck.

John frowned.

The other guy was a guy, too. They were both guys. Having sex.

With each other.

"I don't think so," John said. He put a finger on the mousepad and moved the pointer up to the stop button. But then the guy on his knees took the other man's cock deep into his mouth, really deep, before letting it go and nuzzling into the guy's crotch.

John lifted his hand from the pad, just as the man doing the blowing took the other guy into his mouth again. His eyes were closed, and the look on his face was part concentration, part pleasure. It was possible he was faking, but John didn't think so.

It was kind of hot. John's hand closed around his cock as he watched the man lick and suck, as if it were the most delicious thing he had ever put into his mouth. The other man's hand was in his hair, stroking affectionately.

John gave his cock a pull. There wasn't any reason he couldn't watch this. It was two guys, but it was still a blowjob. An enthusiastic blowjob. John's favorite kind. And it wasn't like the guy was ugly or anything - he was good-looking in a square-jawed kind of way.

Stroking harder he matched his rhythm to the cock moving in and out of the guy's mouth, over and over again. He wanted a mouth on his cock, warm and wet, sucking. He liked being sucked, liked the way it just pulled the pleasure right through him.

The way it felt like his orgasm was being pulled out of him into his lover's mouth. Coming from a blowjob was different than coming from fucking, especially when she kept sucking and swallowing, not stopping. That just made it better.

The guy being blown wrapped his hand around the other guy's neck and started lifting his hips, pushing himself in and out of the mouth of the guy blowing him, pulling him a little forward at the same time. If anything the guy doing the sucking looked even more blissed out, as if he liked having his mouth fucked.

Maybe he did.

John wanted to fuck the mouth of someone who liked it. He lifted his hips a little, fucking his hand as if he was the man on the screen pushing himself in and out of his friend's mouth.

He came hard, scrabbling for tissues to contain the mess, even as the pleasure of it made his whole body shake. The laptop tipped from his thighs to the mattress. John barely noticed.

Panting, he stared up at the ceiling, come-filled tissues still pressed to the head of his cock. He'd needed that. When his breath had calmed, he dropped the tissues into the can near his bed, and picked up the laptop. The two men were still there. They were doing other things now, things John didn't want to think about.

Because he wasn't into that. He just liked blowjobs. Clicking off the file, he turned off the computer and rose from the bed, pulling up his pants so he could walk to the bathroom where he brushed his teeth.

Stripping off his clothes, he moved the laptop back to the desk and slid into the bed, feeling pleasantly relaxed from not just one but two orgasms in one day. He hadn't jerked off more than once in a day in a long time.

He should thank Rodney, if only to watch him blush and stammer out a "you're welcome." John smiled at the thought, dropping into sleep before he could decide on what exactly he'd say to Rodney.


"I'm not saying it's a bad idea, but," Rodney paused to shovel more eggs into his mouth. "It's not exactly a good idea, either."

"What?" John asked as he sat.

"Modifying the energy weapon to produce an EMP," Zelenka said.

"Cool." John poured ketchup on his hash browns. "Can you really do that?"

"It's not the doing that's problematic, it's the testing." Rodney chewed noisily, then slurped his coffee.

"Either way," Elizabeth said, "It's important we determine if it's at all possible."

Rodney nodded rapidly.

"It's the kind of weapon that could certainly come in handy. Do we know if Wraith ships are vulnerable?" John asked.

"Maybe," Zelenka answered. "It depends." He launched into an explanation of exactly what it depended on, but John was only half listening, because Rodney was shoving a slice of melon into his mouth, pushing it past his lips and it was disconcertingly reminiscent of the movie he had watched the night before.

"Right?" Zelenka asked.

John nodded. "If you say so."

It was bad enough he had woken up hard, and still carried lingering whispers of a dream where he was being touched by hands that sometimes weren't soft and delicate.

"No, no, no, no." Rodney said, coffee cup in one hand, the other waving in the air. "Well, maybe."

"So how do we find out for sure?" John asked, ignoring Rodney's waving hand.

"Simulations," Rodney answered.

"We have enough data," Zelenka said, but he wasn't talking to John.

Rodney nodded. "Shouldn’t take long to come up with the first test."

"Three, four hours," Zelenka said.

"Well then do it, gentlemen, and let me know the results." Elizabeth rose.

Rodney and Zelenka followed soon after, leaving John alone with his breakfast.


John checked in on Rodney and Zelenka a few hours later only to find them both gesticulating and speaking in a language that went completely over John's head. He was tempted to poke Rodney and suggest he adjust the flux capacitor just to get a reaction but decided against it at the last minute, backing slowly away instead.

He was fairly certain Rodney hadn't even noticed him.

He'd planned on getting Rodney to have lunch with him and his stomach rumbled half-heartedly. Since he'd eaten a late and rather large breakfast, he could probably get by with power bars. And then he could watch a couple more of Rodney's movies. Brightening at the thought, John headed for his room.

This time, settled on the bed with his pants pushed down around his knees, put the tissues within easy reach, and snagged his power bars before clicking on the first movie. Then he leaned back, and opened his power bar.

Except there was something about eating while watching porn that seemed wrong. Like he was mixing appetites or something. Placing the power bar on the nightstand, he fast forwarded past the opening dialog. It wasn't as though he really cared who characters were or what their excuse for having sex was as long as they did it.


And they did. There was groping, fucking and the obligatory moans. And bad kissing. John tilted his head to the side. It wasn't any sexier from that angle. Tongues should never meet in mid-air like that. When kissing they should be in one mouth or the other, not in between.

Fortunately, they stopped kissing and resumed fucking. That was better. John gave his cock a long, slow stroke.

Okay, that guy had an incredibly unattractive ass for a porn star. Too flat. And the woman seemed kind of bored by his penis.

So was John. He glanced at his watch. He had twenty minutes until his officers' meeting and a fully hard cock that was nowhere near coming.

Stopping the video, he pulled up the file he'd watched the night before. A nice thick cock sliding in and out of a willing mouth was much better. He gave his cock a loving stroke. Much, much better.

There was something about the way the guy sucked. Maybe it was the genuine enthusiasm, or maybe that he was able to take so much of the damn thing into his mouth, either way it looked like it would feel really good to be on the receiving end of that mouth. John imagined it, warm and wet, sliding down his shaft, so good, and if he reached down to touch he'd feel the short, spiked hair and bristled cheeks--

John's hand faltered on his cock.

He wasn’t into guys; he was into blowjobs.

He resumed stroking.

Maybe Rodney was into them, though. John frowned, considering the idea. Rodney had never come across to him as gay, what with the women he was always drooling over. Even Wraith who only looked like women.

But he owned gay porn.

Maybe Rodney liked guys as much as women. Maybe Rodney did guys.

Or maybe he just liked good blowjobs. There wasn't anything wrong with liking good blowjobs.

John's hand moved faster.

Maybe Rodney gave blowjobs. Maybe he sucked cock. Maybe Rodney wrapped his lips around a thick shaft just like the guy was doing on-screen. John couldn't imagine what it would be like to have a cock in his mouth, it seemed big, really big, nothing like the soft nub of a woman's clit. Maybe it was easier--a bigger target, definitely.

John lifted his hand to his mouth, slid two fingers in over his tongue and sucked. A cock would be bigger. A cock would be thicker and longer, it would fill his mouth entirely. He pulled his fingers out and pushed them back in, trying to figure out what it would be like to have something like that sliding over his lips.

Then he noticed the action on-screen had changed. The guy was on his hands and knees, and the suckee was pushing inside of him. He was putting his cock up the other guy's ass.

That was just wrong, there was no way that could feel good. A finger or two was one thing, but no, not a cock, not there.

But it didn't seem to be wrong for the guy on the bottom, because he had his eyes closed in a look of total bliss. The other guy bent over to kiss him between the shoulder blades, and then leaned back and oh, camera close-up, more close-up than anyone needed, of a cock sliding in and out, John could see the edge of the condom on it, it was all shiny and slick and--

He whimpered, cock surging. He pulled his fingers from his mouth and used both hands--he was close, so close, and what if he was the one on his hands and knees, ass in the air--what if some guy was taking him, using him, shoving his cock--

He came in a rush, hips straining, cock pumping come all over his hands in a dizzying burst of pleasure. When it finally subsided, he grabbed the tissues, cleaned a hand off, and closed the computer angrily on the two men who were still going at it full force.

Sitting back, he held a handful of tissues over his cock, trying to catch his breath. "Damn it, Rodney." After a moment he cleaned himself off, then opened the computer again. He shut down the program, found the file, and dragged it into the trash.

Then dragged it out again.


After his officer's meeting, he found Rodney still in the lab, quietly working by himself this time. As John approached, he frowned at something on his computer, shook his head and began typing furiously.

"So what's the story with this weapon?" John demanded.

"What?" Rodney looked up, startled, hands frozen in mid-type. "You know, if I had an uninterrupted moment to review the data, I might actually have a story."

"Cut the crap, Rodney."

"You don't have to snap at me," Rodney said in a petulant tone. His mouth twisted, and John wished he wouldn't do that, because he did not need to think about Rodney's mouth right now.

And whether it had ever been wrapped around a penis.

"Okay, okay." John took a breath, pulled up a chair and sat. "Just tell me if you're ready to do the testing."

"I think," Rodney waved a finger in the air, "tomorrow."


"Yes." Rodney beamed at him. "A preliminary test, certainly, but if all goes well we'll know whether to proceed with further development."

"Fine." John supposed the news should make him happy. "Just tell me when."

"Hmmm." Rodney paged through some data and looked thoughtful. "Maybe 1300 hours? It will take an hour or so to get the jumper properly outfitted. Check with me again in the morning to firm it up."

John watched Rodney's hands moving on the computer, wondering just how good Rodney was at firming things up. He tried to picture Rodney with another man. Touching another man. Putting his hands on a man's penis.

He wondered what Rodney looked like naked.

"Um, Colonel?"

John jerked his head up. "What?" he snarled.

Sometimes, he hated Rodney. Just a little.

"Mind if I get back to work?"

"No," John said and left.


It took a little doing but he was able to find the file he'd watched earlier, the one with the two women and the glass dildo. It got him hard; it got him off, and John went to sleep content that the whole ass fucking thing had just been a momentary lapse.

Two people having sex, clearly enjoying it, getting turned on by that didn't make him gay, just human, like everyone else.

Who didn't get turned on by two people having sex?

And since he got just as turned on by two women, he was good. Fine. Better than fine.

Which is why he was whistling as he entered the jumper bay to meet Rodney. He was a little late, but Rodney probably wouldn't notice.

"Nice of you to show up." Rodney was lying under the weapons console, but he stuck his head out when John entered the jumper.

"It's only five after. Besides you aren't even ready."

Rodney snorted and stuck his head back under the console. He was lying on his back with his knees bent, his feet about a foot apart. If he'd been naked John would have been able to see everything.

But he wasn't naked. He was clothed and John couldn't see anything.

Which was good because he didn't want to see anything.

Rodney probably had a nice full ass. One that would fit in your hand. One you could squeeze.

"Do you have to do that?" John snapped.

"Only if you want an energy weapon to experiment with," Rodney answered, as though he knew what John had been talking about. John was pretty sure he didn't. There wasn't any way Rodney could know that John had been thinking about his ass, and the opening between his cheeks, and whether Rodney was hairy there. He knew Rodney had chest hair.

And arm hair.

Had he ever seen Rodney's legs? John didn't think so.

His balls were probably hairy, though.

John dropped into the pilot's seat and closed his eyes. He was not going to think about this.

Rodney snapped his fingers. "Make yourself useful and hand me that spanner, would you?"

Retrieving it from the floor where Rodney had obviously left it, John squatted beside him. "Here."

"Thanks." Rodney wrapped his hand around the base of the spanner.

John told himself that he wasn't going to think about that either.

Then Rodney lowered his legs to the floor. John thought that was a good thing for a whole three seconds until he realized that squatting next to Rodney's hips meant that he was pretty much looking down at the bulge in the front of Rodney's pants.

It was a soft bulge.

A full, soft bulge.

"All right, that should do it."

Startled, John jerked his head up abruptly, lost his balance and sat down hard.

Rodney twisted out from under the console and gave him a puzzled glance. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing." His eyes fixed on Rodney's face, John kept his expression carefully blank. "Just waiting for you to get finished with--with whatever it is you're doing."

"I'm done now." Rodney still wore a puzzled frown. "Anytime you're ready, Colonel."

"Good." John nodded and managed to get to the pilot's seat without incident, and soon they were up and away, soaring above the Lantean sea. John glanced over his shoulder, to where Rodney was working on his datapad. "Is this an atmospheric test, or do you want to be in space?" he asked, happy to focus on the work at hand.

Rodney didn't look up. "Let's try for space right now."


Rodney gave him the information, and John pointed the jumper upwards, and soon the sky changed in color from bright blue to a deep sapphire, stars twinkling all around them. He set the jumper into a shallow orbit, flying to the opposite side of the planet in order to protect the systems in the city. After a half hour or so, Rodney came to sit next to him, plugging his datapad into the console and watching the readout. After a moment he gave a little contented hum, but then frowned and drummed his fingers on his thigh.

John watched those fingers, wondering what it would be like if Rodney's thigh was naked, and if his drumming fingers moved up onto an erect cock. The way they would if he was masturbating to images of men doing things with other men.

Then John turned away and stared out the jumper windshield. He didn’t need to be having these thoughts about Rodney.

It was entirely possible he was watching too much porn.

"Hey, Rodney," he asked, in need of a distraction. "How come the ancient computers aren't affected by EMPs?"

"Hmmm?" Rodney finally looked up. "Their systems work differently than ours. It has to do with the way the data is encoded."


"Their coding is done on a quantum level."

"Oh," John said. "That explains it." When Rodney huffed in displeasure he bit back a grin.

"Listen, it's very complicated--"

"I'm sure it is." John nodded. Normally Rodney liked to explain very complicated things to him. "Why don't we encode our data that way, then?"

"Because we--it's not the same--we don't have the--"

"You don't know how they did it, do you?" John grinned at him.

Rodney looked indignant. "You know, I have a lot of work to do here, to get the weapon ready for testing."

"Don't let me stop you." A sideways glance showed Rodney staring down at his datapad again. John waited until he had typed in one or two commands, then added, "Those Ancients must have been pretty damn smart."

Rodney's head shot up. "Well, yes, to a point. They were far more technologically advanced than us--"

"I'll say. They must have been geniuses. Each and every one of them."

"And they had many more thousands of years of civilization to reach that level of technology," Rodney added loudly.

He sounded downright insulted.

"That's okay, Rodney, I still think you're pretty smart, too." He gave Rodney a sympathetic look. "I'm sure you'll figure it out."

Rodney glared at him.

Proud of himself, John turned back to the jumper controls. "And you know the value of good porn."

"Oh. Well, yes, I do." Rodney sounded a bit mollified.

A thought struck John. "Did you ever come across any in the Ancient database?"

"No, although we haven't actually been searching for it."

"I'll bet their porn would be boring." He didn't think the Ancients were much fun, truth be told. "Yours wasn't. I checked out a few files, and it's the good stuff." The straight stuff anyway; he still had his doubts about the gay stuff, because it was obviously doing weird things to his mind. He glanced over to see that the tips of Rodney's ears where turning pink. It was kind of cute.

"Can we just get this test done?"

John checked the HUD. "Oh, we're here." He brought the jumper to a halt. "Go for it."

Rodney disconnected his datapad, and with a quick nod, rose from his seat and moved to the back of the jumper. John spun his chair around to watch, eyebrows rising as Rodney bent over, displaying a smooth round ass to perfection which did nothing to help his vow to Not Think About Such Things. "Powering up," Rodney announced, straightening.

The Ancients might have been really smart, but dull as dishwater. Rodney was certainly really smart, but he was never boring. And definitely good with his hands, John thought, watching him make adjustments to the connections.

"Okay, discharging three, two, one--" Rodney activated the device from the datapad.

John waited. He felt, rather than heard, a faint thump.

Rodney watched the readout on the pad, then nodded. "Nice."

"That's it?" John asked, vaguely disappointed.

Rodney shrugged. "Yes?"

"I was expecting..." John spread his hands. "A bigger climax."

"I'm sure you were," Rodney said, most of his attention still on the datapad. "Feel free to start back whenever you're ready."

Sighing, John turned the jumper toward Atlantis.


Crossing his legs, John rested the computer on the bed in front of him and began going through Rodney's files one at a time. If he moved the gay stuff over to a separate folder, he wouldn't click on them by mistake anymore. Of course to find the right files he had to look at each and every one. It was tempting to watch and he soon decided he needed a third folder of greatest hits.

By the twentieth file he was hard as a rock and wondering why one man needed that much porn.

Then he remembered that man was Rodney and clicked on the next file. More lesbians. Rodney was clearly a man who liked sex in any combination. Although John still hadn't found any more gay stuff.

Moving the lesbian one to the "To Watch" folder, he opened the next file. Finally, another gay one.

With kissing.

John knew he should relocate the file to the gay folder and keep going. But the kissing was nice, better than most porn movie kissing. One guy looked really intent, like the kissing mattered or maybe the guy he was kissing mattered.

There was touching too, and it wasn’t following the whole porn formula of touch four places, grab a crotch.

It was kind of erotic, watching a hand curling around a biceps, sliding up to a shoulder.

Rodney had biceps like that. Sturdy. It was funny how for a guy who was as emotional as Rodney was, he had a sturdy body. Kinda like his body was saying "rely on me" while his mouth was flapping away. John liked the flapping, as long as no one was shooting at them, or about to shoot at them, or likely to shoot at them because of the flapping, which meant he liked the flapping most of the time.

One of the guys wrapped his hand around both of their cocks, pushing them together. It was a striking sight.

With a frustrated noise, John set the laptop to the side and opened his pants, pushing them down around his thighs before picking up the laptop, this time cradling it in the crook of his arm, watching the action closely. The way the taller guy was kissing the other guys neck was really kind of hot, and as John closed his hand around his cock he wondered what Rodney's skin would taste like. Rodney would probably moan like that, too--hell, Rodney moaned when he was eating the crappy food from the mess, god only knew what kind of sounds he would make if someone was touching his cock.

Their cocks would probably look good together, too, just like that--thick and dark as they slid through his fingers--

"Fuck," John ground out. He tossed the computer down on the bed. Licking his hand, he closed his eyes and jerked himself off hard and fast, letting his own images play out in his head, images of Rodney, naked and excited, pushing him down on the bed, kissing him, touching him, making him come.

When he was done he lay back, come dripping on his stomach, forearm draped over his closed eyes.

He had just gotten off to a fantasy about his very male friend and team member.

It wasn't just about good porn, or a willing mouth.

It was entirely possible he was gay.

The thought should have disturbed him more. Heck, if someone as brilliant as Rodney could be gay, or bi, or whatever he wanted to call it, John could be, too.

Fine. So it was a little weird. He could handle weird.


What he couldn't handle was feeling like a teenager again. Does she like me? Was she flirting or just being nice? That spark, he wasn't imagining it, right? Except now the she was a he.

A he who was giving John no help whatsoever. John teased Rodney; Rodney looked superior. John poked Rodney; Rodney looked superior. John gave Rodney his best flirty smile; Rodney looked superior. For a man with such an expressive face, he sure looked superior a lot.

It was damned annoying.

Finally John decided that he needed to be more direct. He did men, well theoretically. Rodney did men. John wanted Rodney, and he was pretty sure Rodney would be interested once John was able to get it through Rodney's oblivious skull that he was interested. So, all he had to do was ask Rodney out, pour on the charm, and then sex.


The door to Rodney's lab slid open and John pulled in a breath before stepping inside. He went straight to Rodney's lab bench and rested one hip against it. Rodney barely glanced at him.

"So, Rodney, you want to watch a movie tonight?"

"Depends. What movie?" Rodney didn't bother to look up from his computer.

"You choose."

Rodney looked over his shoulder at John. "I get to choose?"

John leaned some more, determined to look casual. "Sure."

"I never get to choose," Rodney said, frowning. John was not finding the little twist in his forehead attractive. Because he might be gay, but he wasn't a complete weirdo.

"Which makes it your turn."

Rodney opened his mouth as if to point out the illogic in John's argument, but a beep from his laptop drew his attention.

"So 2000 hours?"

"Fine, fine," Rodney said waving back at him, his eyes still on his computer.

Well, John thought as the door closed behind him, that hadn't been so bad.


Rodney showed up ten minutes late. When John let him in, he stared at John. "What?" John finally asked.

"You changed your clothes."

"Yup," John said, pleased that Rodney noticed he was in his good jeans. He had shaved, too. Maybe Rodney would notice that later.

"Huh." Rodney gave him a puzzled look, which was much better than the superior look John had been getting.

He was making progress.

"What'd you bring?" John asked.

"Oh." Rodney waved a DVD. "Blade Runner."


Rodney headed for the desk, but John made a beeline for the bed and bounced down onto it. "Come on, it's more comfortable over here."

Rodney hesitated, eyeing first the bed, then the chair, as if mulling over the relative comfort of each.

Hoping to nip an esoteric discussion in the bud, John pulled his feet up and scooted over. He patted the empty spot next to him, looking as harmless as possible. He threw in a grin for good measure, and got a suspicious frown in response. "Oh, for god's sake, just get over here, Rodney," he finally said.

If this were a porn movie Rodney would be on the bed groping him by now.

He was tempted to point that out to Rodney, only he was pretty sure Rodney wasn't aware they were on a date. Not yet, anyway.

But at least now Rodney was sitting on the bed beside him, and was even politely removing his shoes.

It was a start.

John edged a little closer, but Rodney didn't notice. With a sigh, John turned his attention to getting the movie started.

They sat, shoulder to shoulder, watching the movie on the laptop. John relaxed a little, leaning into Rodney, enjoying the warmth of his body. He hoped to enjoy it a whole lot more later.

"Darryl Hannah was hot," Rodney mused.

"You just like her because she's blonde."

"Nothing wrong with liking blondes."

"I didn't say there was." Other than the fact that John wasn't blonde.

"You don't like blondes?"

"Depends on the blonde," John answered, not adding "weren't you blonde as a kid?"

"So what do you like, other than ascended or almost ascended?" Rodney waved his hand to emphasize "ascended."


"Smart's good," Rodney agreed.


Rodney pointed at him. "Hard to beat imaginative."

"Passionate. Someone who likes sex." And has lots of movies about it. John didn't say that last part.

"Oh, yeah." Rodney's eyes got a blissful, far-away look, as though the very thought of a lover who liked sex made him happy.

"I like sex," John said, his voice low. "A lot."

"Me, too," Rodney said with a wistful sigh.

Rodney wasn't getting it. Taking a deep breath, John rested his hand on Rodney's thigh.

Rodney went completely still. "Um, Colonel? Are you… that is…"

"Yes," John said, squeezing a little. "I am." He smiled sweetly, despite his racing heart.

"Oh," Rodney squeaked, then cleared his throat. "Why?"

"Well, I like sex. You like sex. I thought maybe we could like it together." John softened the smile, trying to ease Rodney's shock. Obviously Rodney never expected this from him.

Rodney's eyes grew even wider. "The thing is I don't… I've never…"

"It's okay, Rodney. You don't have to pretend with me. I know you like guys, too. I've never actually tried it, but I want to. Between the two of us I think we'd be good at it, don't you?" John looked up at him from under his lashes. It always worked with women.

"You think we… You want to…" Rodney started to sound panicked, then his expression shifted. "Wait, you think I'm gay?"

He didn't understand why Rodney was being so reticent. "I don't think you're gay," he explained.

"What? You're claiming to have evidence?"

"Well, yeah, I have your porn collection, remember?" John removed his hand, confused. Clearly Rodney was under the impression that he wasn't gay.

This wasn't going at all the way he had hoped.

"Since when does porn make you gay?"

"When it's gay porn. Two guys having sex--"

"I have gay porn?"

John's heart sank. "If you don’t want to have sex with me, all you have to do is say 'no.'"

"Can we start this conversation over again from the top?" Rodney asked. He looked genuinely perplexed and John softened a little.

John nodded. Once.

"Okay, then," Rodney said. "You found gay porn in among the files you copied from me."

John nodded again.

"Really? Was it just a scene or two, or a whole movie?"

"A whole movie. Three of them."



"Listen, I downloaded a bunch of movies the last time we were on Earth. I haven't had a chance to watch most of them. I tend to stick to my favorites, you know?"

His favorites. The ones with women. Probably the ones with two women. "Oh." John shifted his gaze from Rodney to the movie, his face growing warm.

"I’m sorry," Rodney said in a small voice.

"Not your fault. Oh, hey, look at that, Harrison Ford just shot someone." He could feel Rodney watching him, and he wished Rodney would stop.

Actually, he wished the bed would just swallow him up whole and deposit him on the floor below.

"I just--"

"Let's not talk about it anymore, okay?" John said quickly. He just wanted the evening to be over with.

They watched another ten minutes in silence.

"Um, you know, I think I should probably go." Rodney sounded sympathetic.

John didn't answer.

Rodney moved to the side of the bed and began putting on his shoes. He stood. "Well, then. I'll see you tomorrow."


"Good-night, John."

Hey, all it took to get Rodney to use his name was a little humiliation. He glanced up at Rodney and forced himself to smile for a few seconds. "See you tomorrow."

"Right." Shoulders hunched, Rodney left.


After a fitful night, the first thing John did when he woke that morning was start up his computer and dump all the movies from Rodney into the trash. Het or gay, it didn't matter, what did matter was that they were from Rodney.

He might have forgotten to empty the trash.

Then he grabbed a power bar and went for a run. After which, he showered, holed himself up in his office, and worked, thankful that they didn't have an off-world mission today.

Not that he was avoiding Rodney. He was a Lieutenant Colonel. He was above such things.

Eventually he had to leave his office to seek out food. He had almost made it to mess safely when he heard Rodney calling out.


John stopped short, pasted a smile onto his face, and spun around on his heel. "Yes, Rodney?"

"Um, I--" Rodney blinked at him.

John held up his hand. The last thing he needed from Rodney was another apology regarding an incident he never ever wanted to think about again. "Rodney," he started.

"We need another test run in the jumper," Rodney said. "For the weapon."

"Oh." Fine. No additional apologies, then. Not that John cared. He didn't care one bit. Even though this was all Rodney's fault for having gay porn when he wasn't even gay. "Okay. When?"


"All right. See you in the jumper bay."

Rodney nodded.

They stared at each other. Rodney looked pained. John felt pained.

Rodney nodded again. "Okay. Okay. See you there." He hesitated once more, then fled the corridor.

Things were slightly better in the jumper. Rodney was in the back, busy with the weapon, and John kept his full attention on flying. He kept the jumper in the atmosphere this time, and watched the land as he flew--mountains, rivers, lakes passing beneath him. He swooped down into a valley, then up again over a mountain ridge. After a while he began to relax.

Then Rodney came and sat up front, right next to him. "I'd like to do both an atmospheric and a space test this time, okay?"

"You got it." He glanced over to find Rodney staring him with an odd expression on his face. "Which one first?"

"Are you really gay?"

John's hands tensed on the controls. "No. Now which test do you want to run first?"

"John, seriously, I don't have a problem with it," Rodney said in a gentle tone. "Far from it, I just--"

"Rodney, we're here to do a weapons test. Can we save the human sexuality discussion for another time?"

"We can." Out of the corner of his eye John could see Rodney nodding. "I would like to discuss it. At another time. Not now. But we should talk. We should definitely talk--"

John turned and glared at Rodney.

Rodney's mouth snapped shut, and he ducked his head, studiously tapping away at his datapad.

John turned his attention back to flying. But he couldn't quell the ridiculous flutter deep in his gut, because Rodney wanted to talk, and John didn't know what that meant.

It probably meant nothing at all.


He wasn't surprised when Rodney knocked on his door that night. Rodney had an annoying habit of not letting anything go.

John simply stood there, drawn up to his full height, and looked at Rodney, his face as blank as he could make it, which was pretty blank.

"Can I come in?" Rodney asked, adding a "please" when John didn't answer right away.

Backing out of the door, he stood to the side, giving Rodney room to enter.

"I'm sorry about the confusion," Rodney said as soon as the door slid shut.

"Not your fault," John answered coolly.

"Well, I can understand how you might have misinterpreted, not that it's a complete misinterpretation. It might be. I don't know."

John ignored the return of the ridiculous flutter. "You don't know."

"I think, I think I could be gay for you," Rodney said, looking directly at John for the first time since he'd entered John's quarters.

"You could… for me?"

"Look at you," Rodney said waving his hand at John, first up, then down, then back up again. "You're very attractive. And smart for someone who isn't a physicist, and imaginative. You like sex, and I'm completely willing to overlook the fact that you aren't blonde."

"And the fact that I'm male?"

Rodney nodded. "That too."

"Might be kind of hard to overlook when we're having sex," John said, allowing a little casual sarcasm into his voice.

"Well, yes, but I figure we can work on it."

"Work on it?" John stared at him. Only Rodney.

"Yes, work on it. I like you. We have fun together and we save each other's lives on a regular basis. That has to count for something. Plus, there's all the other stuff I mentioned."

"Right, other stuff. You're insane, you know that? You can't just change your orientation."

"You did."

"I did not. I thought about it." John crossed his arms. "And I watched porn."

"So show me some porn," Rodney answered, perfectly matter-of-fact.

"You have to actually be attracted to someone to become involved. You can't just say, 'Hey, I like this person. We have fun together. Let's become lovers.'"

"You want to be lovers? I was thinking just friends with perks, but lovers works." After a pause, he added, "You're attracted to me?"

"Rodney." John dragged the word out. He knew it made him sound whiny, but it was the only way he had to express his exasperation. He was still saying, "eee" when Rodney's mouth covered his, turning the sound into "mmmpppffff."

Rodney was kissing him.

And Rodney kept on kissing him, until John kissed him back, and then Rodney made a small noise and kissed him harder, his hand cupped around John's neck. Rodney's mouth was warm and his lips were softer than they should be and by the time they finished John's hands were on Rodney's waist and Rodney's fingers were in his hair.

When Rodney pulled back, John simply blinked at him. He was pretty sure he had been saying something a moment ago but for the life of him he couldn't remember what and Rodney's eyes were really, really blue up close.

"Yes, yes," Rodney said. "I think I could definitely be gay. Because that was a great kiss. Am I wrong here?"

"No. I mean, yes, you--" John dropped his hands, stepping back out of Rodney's reach. "It doesn't work like that, okay?"

"Why not?" Rodney demanded, folding his arms across his chest. "It can work any way we want it to work."

Rodney had a point.

And it really had been a great kiss.

"Listen," Rodney continued. "Here's what we do-- you show me the porn you liked, we do a test run ourselves, and then evaluate the data."

John opened his mouth to protest--he wasn't a scientific experiment, for god's sake--but all he said was, "Okay."

Rodney brightened. "Really?"

"Yeah. If you think you really want to--"

Rodney held a finger up. "Great kiss," he reminded John.

"It's going to take more than just a great kiss," John insisted.

"I know that."

Rodney gave him a look that might have been hungry in nature, and the flutter in John's belly started up all over again. "Okay. Come on, then," he said, trying hide his nervousness.

He grabbed his computer and headed toward the bed. This time Rodney eagerly bounced down next to him as he booted up the computer, and that was nice. When John looked up again, Rodney had already kicked his shoes off, and after a moment's hesitation, pulled his legs up and stretched them out next to John's. "Ready?" John asked.

Rodney nodded solemnly.

John hunted for his carefully sorted out folders, and after a brief moment of panic, found them in the trash. "Um, I was a little angry before," he explained as he dragged them out.

"I made you mad? You really are attracted to me, aren't you?"

John found the file he was looking for, and clicked on it. "No, I always make passes at men I'm not attracted to."

Rodney grinned at him and sidled closer, until their thighs were touching.

The movie started and John sucked in a breath. There it was on the screen, two men kissing.

"We've done that," Rodney said and John shot him in a grin. Sometimes Rodney was just so Rodney. John liked that about him.

Then one of the men slid to his knees.

"Okay, we haven't done that," Rodney said.

Maybe we will, John thought and then scolded himself for his optimism. One kiss, even a great kiss didn't mean anything, not really. The guy on his knees had that blissed out expression, happily running his lips along the side of the other guy's shaft. It was really hot and John felt himself getting hard.

"Huh," Rodney said and turned his head to the side. "He really looks like he likes it."

John nodded. "That's what sucked me in."

Rodney grinned at him.

"Very funny."

Pressing his shoulder into John's, Rodney said, "So you like that he likes it."

"Yeah," John said, pressing back. "Don't you prefer enthusiastic blowjobs?"

"I've always been pretty much happy with any blowjob," Rodney said and John shifted his attention back to the screen. "Although I do have a bit of an oral fixation."

John looked at him and Rodney smiled. It wasn’t teasing. It wasn't a grin. It was an honest-to-god smile. Wow, John's dick seemed to like Rodney's smile even more than John did. He started to lean in and Rodney's smile faded, his eyes widening. John pressed his lips to Rodney's, lifting one hand to cup Rodney's cheek.

It was slow and hot. Very hot. Scorchingly hot. If John had known kissing a guy would be like this, he'd have switched teams years ago.

Rodney was breathing hard when they parted. "That's two great kisses."

"Uh-huh," John answered absently, already focused on kiss number three.

Kiss number three got a whole lot more interesting when Rodney parted his lips and let John in. John shifted, twisting so that he could get closer, tugging on Rodney's shoulder. The scrape of Rodney's whiskered chin was startlingly erotic, he was definitely kissing a guy, with the broad shoulder under his palm and the big wide mouth and Rodney smelled really good even though he only smelled like himself.

"I like this," Rodney murmured, sliding his lips across John's jaw.

"Me, too." John turned his head as Rodney sucked on an earlobe. He caught sight of the computer, balanced precariously on his lap. The cocksucking was still going on, and the camera pulled back, showing the guy on the receiving end arching his back and then reaching down to stroke the other guy's cheek.

Rodney sucked just behind his ear, and John moaned, his cock achingly hard. He tried to check out Rodney's crotch, but Rodney had one leg pulled up, and John couldn't tell if he was hard but, god, he hoped so because he was having a really good time and he wanted Rodney to have a good time, too.

Rodney pulled back and watched the screen. "I can definitely see the appeal."

"Of watching porn?"

"No," Rodney said in his fondest 'you idiot' tone. "Not that it's bad, I like that too--oh, hey, I really like that, although how can he breathe?"

John watched the deepthroating. "Because he breathes through his nose, like the rest of us?"

"Well, some of us have sinus problems. Allergies, you know?" The scene shifted; one man was on his hands and knees, the other, kneeling behind him. "And how come neither of them have chest hair? That's not right."

"I have chest hair," John said hopefully. He also had everywhere-else-hair, unfortunately.

Rodney turned to him. "Show me."

"You want me to..." John tugged at the collar of his tee-shirt.

Rodney nodded.

Definitely a positive sign. John leaned forward, eagerly pulling his shirt off over his head. Rodney stared as if fascinated, then reached a hand out, fingertips lightly brushing John's skin. It almost tickled. Then his eyes swept downward, catching sight of the bulge in John's pants. His eyes widened, but before John could say anything Rodney's mouth covered his again. Hands on his chest, Rodney pushed him down on the bed, climbing over him, knocking the computer off his lap. John spread his legs, welcoming him, moaning with happiness and relief from the weight of Rodney on his cock--he had been waiting forever for this.

John spread his legs wider, bumping his knee against the forgotten computer, sending it tumbling off the bed.

It hit the floor with a crash.

John cringed. "Sorry," he murmured, craning his head, trying to see where it fell.

"The hell with it." Rodney pushed him back down and kissed him, hard.

"I probably broke it."

"I'll get you another one," Rodney whispered, pushing his hips into John, and yes, hard cock, very hard cock. John kissed him frantically, hands on Rodney's back, under his shirt, trying to pull it off but Rodney was focused on simply rubbing his entire body against John. Not that John was complaining. It was new and different, being pushed into the mattress, being held down by another man's weight. New and different and shockingly hot.

John got the shirt up to Rodney shoulders, then grunted, "Get this off, damn it."

Rodney obeyed, yanking the shirt over his head, narrowly missing John's nose with his elbow.

It was never like this in the porn vids.

And John was glad because this was much more fun, Rodney's harsh panting in his ear, Rodney's naked chest pressed against his. Rodney was into it. Rodney really liked it.

John turned the tables, giving Rodney a shove and rolling over on top of him. He straddled Rodney's hips, sitting on him.

"Oh wow," Rodney said, as if surprised to find himself on his back. "That was really hot."

"Me flipping you over was hot?" John kind of liked that idea. "I can do it again."

"Maybe later." Rodney slid his hands up John's arms, curling them around John's upper arms before moving up to his shoulders.

John kissed him. Then he teased his way along the side of Rodney's neck, nipping and tasting. Rodney lifted his hips, his hands moving over John's back and shoulders, urging John closer. Lifting himself up on his arms, John admired Rodney's chest. It was pale but broad, with a scattering of hair right down the middle, between his very pink nipples. And further down, past this belly, he could see a visible bulge in Rodney's pants, right next to the visible bulge in his own. John slid down until he was straddling Rodney's thighs.

Rodney opened his mouth to protest, but fell silent when John's hand covered his cock. There were layers of cloth between them, but John could feel it under his hand, hard, forced into a curve by Rodney's pants. John moved his hand up and down. He was touching a cock that wasn't his. Feeling for the head with his fingertips, he rubbed it as well as he could through Rodney's pants.

"John," Rodney said, and John looked up at him, a smile spreading across his face.

"Can I?" John asked, reaching for the top button on Rodney's pants.

"Yes, yes, yes," Rodney chanted in a way that was hot and endearing when it shouldn't have been either.

John popped open the first button. There were Rodney's boxers. Bright purple. Maybe Rodney had been gay all along and just hadn't known it. He undid the next button, then the next, watching as Rodney's cock pushed upward, trying to get free.

One last button and Rodney's cock was rising up out of his pants, tenting his boxers. He couldn't help pressing his hand over it again, rubbing through the soft cotton. It was so damn hard, and maybe that was the best thing of all, Rodney hard, just for him.

Rodney wanted him.

"Oh, for god's sake, here--" Rodney lifted his hips and shoved his pants and boxers down.

Rodney wanted him a lot. John grinned as he helped tug the clothes out of the way, freeing Rodney's cock. It poked up happily and John wrapped a hand around it.

"Wow," John said. "You know, I've got one of those, too." He unbuttoned his pants with one hand while holding Rodney's cock in the other.

"Oh?" Rodney pushed himself up on his elbows, watching with a dazed expression.

John pulled his cock out and pushed it along side Rodney's, trying to cradle them together but his pants got in the way. "Damn it." The guys in the movies had never had this problem.

"Well just take them off--"

"I'm trying to--" John reluctantly let go, climbed off of Rodney and stripped off the rest of his clothes. Then he helped Rodney with his, shucking his pants and vibrant underwear and socks and finally they were both naked. "Where were we?" he asked, his cock heavy and bobbing against his thigh as he straddled Rodney again.

"You were right there, and, yes, yes, doing that," Rodney said as John clasped both cocks in his hand.

John liked they way they looked, pushed up next to each other, and then Rodney's hand was there, too, covering his. Sitting up, Rodney pushed their hips together and ran a hand over John's thigh. "You really are hairy, aren't you?"

"Yes, I am," John said, a little indignant even though Rodney was grinning.

"You're hairy and you have muscles and a penis and no breasts," Rodney continued, his hands moving over John's body. "But you know what? This is really, really fun."

"Damn right it is." John gave Rodney's cock a firm stroke, and Rodney gave a whimpery moan before grabbing hold of John's cock and doing the same thing.

So much better than his own hand--sex was definitely better with two people. Especially when the other person was Rodney, hot naked Rodney, who was as much fun and just as maddening in bed as out of it. He rocked into Rodney's hand, encouraging him, keeping his own hand moving.

Rodney watched their hands for a moment before leaning up for a kiss with an expression of sheer joy.

Rodney's cock in his hand, his tongue in his mouth, it was better than John ever could have imagined and he needed to come, right now, because he had waited so damn long for this. For Rodney. When he whimpered, Rodney speeded up, jerking him off hard and fast. John clung to his shoulder, his mouth open against Rodney's, not really kissing, just panting and needing and then it was there, ripping through him, sheer relief at last.

His hand still on John's cock, Rodney rubbed John's back with his free hand, sending another shudder through him. Rodney kissed him quickly, just a small pursing of his lips. John tried to kiss back.

"You came all over me."

John shifted, about to point out that it wasn't his fault, then he caught sight of Rodney's smile. His very smug smile. "Yes, I did."

"I made you come."

"Yes, you did," John answered, feeling himself starting to smile.

"Was it a really good orgasm?" Rodney asked sounding as smug as he looked. "It looked like a really good orgasm."

"Yeah, it was."

Rodney's expression became even more smug and John laughed, giving the cock still in his hand a small tug.

"Oh." Lifting his head, Rodney looked down at his cock in John's hand. His own hand was still curved around John's.

John stroked slowly, loosening his grip and taking the time to feel Rodney's cock, the smooth skin, the ridge around the head. Sitting back on his heels, he wrapped one hand around the base and brushed the tip with his fingers.

There was a drop of fluid on the slit and John rubbed his finger through it, then raised his finger to his lips.

"That is so hot," Rodney muttered and John grinned. Rodney was definitely into it. Into him. He gave Rodney's cock a long, slow stroke. Rodney lifted his hips and John continued to stroke him, watching Rodney's eyes fall shut. He kissed Rodney's parted lips, startling him.

"Lie down," John said, giving Rodney a push on the chest.

Rodney lay back, and John stretched his hand out over Rodney's chest, then slid it over a nipple. He played with it, rubbing it with his thumb and Rodney's cock surged in his hand.


Then he noticed the streaks of fluid on Rodney's belly. He was surprised by how much he liked it--his come glistening on Rodney's skin. He ran his fingers through it, then rubbed it onto the head of Rodney's cock, making it wet and shiny.

"Having fun?" Rodney asked in a tight voice.

John nodded. "Playing with my own isn't nearly as much fun." He bent down and licked it, then put his mouth over the head and sucked.

Rodney's hips jerked. "Okay."

His voice was high-pitched. John grinned and licked and sucked some more, running his tongue over the silky smooth shaft. Having Rodney's cock in his mouth was pretty damn cool, although he really wasn't sure what to do with it--it felt wider than it looked. He went down too far on it and almost gagged, then scraped his teeth on it when he pulled back up.

Rodney jerked and grunted.

"Sorry," John said, kissing the tip.

"No, no it's all right, really."

John cupped his balls, rolling the sacs in his hand. Rodney had curled up off the bed to watch, his eyes full of affection. John was struck by it--Rodney, who had been completely straight, but wanted John anyway, because John had asked, because he had liked John enough to be willing to give it a try. John was pretty sure whatever it was they were doing was working, and maybe there was something important in all that, but Rodney reached for him and John stopped thinking, stretching out over Rodney's body and sinking into a slow, sweet kiss.

"You're driving me crazy," Rodney said.

"I think that's only fair, after taunting me with all that porn." John eased down between Rodney's legs. His own cock was growing hard again, and John moved his hips forward, sliding his length beside Rodney's.

"Oh, wow," Rodney said, hands going to John's ass. "The rubbing thing is even better naked, and wait a minute--I did not 'taunt' you."

"Did too." John rocked his hips, grinding them against Rodney's body.

"Did no--" Rodney's hands squeezed John's ass. "Do that again."

"This?" John asked, moving his hips in the same way.

"Yes, yes." Rodney removed one hand from John's ass and reached up to curl it around John's neck, pulling him into another kiss.

Rodney was getting really worked up, kissing John wildly, lifting his hips. A worked up Rodney was hotter than anything John had seen in those movies, and he slid one hand under Rodney's ass, guiding Rodney into a shared rhythm.

The rubbing thing was definitely better when naked.

"John," Rodney gasped, breaking their kiss. He was panting and John nuzzled the side of his neck, kissing and sucking. Rodney's pants turned into tiny, rhythmic groans.

Rodney stopped moving, stopped groaning, but before John could react he felt Rodney's entire body shudder. Rodney was coming. Feeling wetness on his belly John started to draw back, wanting to see, but Rodney held him tight.

"Oooh, John," Rodney groaned with heartfelt delight. He clutched John tighter, his hips giving one final jerk. "Wow. That was good. Really, really good. I love sex. Consider me completely, totally gay. As long as I get be gay with you, okay?"

Apparently Rodney babbled after really good sex. It was disturbingly sweet. "Yes, Rodney, we can be gay together," John told him. He gave a little push with his hips, rubbing his cock against sticky skin. "Speaking of which--"

"Hmm." Rodney gave him a push, rolling him off to one side. John went willingly, because Rodney had that look of concentration, the one that meant something good was going to happen.

What happened first was a single, gentle kiss, and then a wet hand wrapped around his cock. John gave a happy sigh, then stretched out on his back, content to let Rodney take care of him. Slow, steady strokes with a come-slicked hand, and John had had no idea something so simple could feel so good, and the come made it kind of dirty and really hot. Moaning, he twisted his hips, trying to push into Rodney's fist.

"Ah--" Rodney stilled his hand. "Don't rush me."

"Rodney, come on." John wiggled his hips.

Rodney resumed stroking him. John tried to pull him down into a kiss, but Rodney resisted. "I want to see it," he said. "It's much better than watching those guys." He jerked his chin towards the floor, presumably where the computer lay.

John panted, openmouthed, trying to make sense of it because Rodney wasn't even looking at his cock. Rodney's eyes were still on his face, looking at him with his typical intense focus, as if he were trying to figure something out. John wanted to ask him what it was, but then Rodney's hand moved fast and hard and John's entire body was on edge and there he was, closing his eyes against the bright white sensation of letting it all go.

It was only after John was finished with the aftershocks that Rodney leaned down and kissed him, a long, lingering kiss, and John was pretty sure he had never felt this content in his life.

"I am so good at this gay stuff," Rodney told him.

John opened his eyes. "We're good at this gay stuff."

"Well, yes, but I got you off twice," Rodney said holding up two wet fingers.

"So we're keeping track?"

Rodney gave a quick nod.

John should have figured sex with Rodney would be like this. "Think we can call your test run a success?" He wanted to remind Rodney that he had been gay first. In theory, at least.

"Yes. Although? I may need more data to confirm my findings. We haven't even given each other blowjobs yet."

"Oh, right." John smiled. He liked blowjobs.

"And then there's penetration. From the top and bottom. Both have their appeal."

John swallowed. Very appealing. "All right then," he said. "We'll add that to the list."

"And then," Rodney pushed himself up on a elbow, obviously warming to the subject. "We'll have to try it all out on my bed, because the different mattress might affect my findings."

"Uh huh." John nodded distractedly, still thinking about bottoming and topping. Being spread out under Rodney...

"Sixty-nines, too. We have to try that out."

John's head jerked up. "Absolutely."

"Although I suppose that's a subset of the blowjob. Then there's shower sex. I like wet, slippery sex."

"Me, too," John said, pointing at Rodney.

"I foresee many nights of hard work ahead of us." Rodney flashed him a brilliant smile.

John pulled Rodney down onto his chest. "Hey, I didn't say being gay was going to be easy."

"Definitely not, but I'm willing to make the sacrifice. Even if it means working long hours late into the night." Rodney shifted settling against John's side.

"Mmmm," John answered, thinking about the feel of Rodney's body against his, naked and pliant.

"I think we'll need a scale."

That got John's attention. "A scale?"

"For rating your orgasms. You are looking for a really big climax, right?"

A burst of laughter from his chest, and John tightened his arms around Rodney's shoulders. "Yes, yes I am."

He was pretty sure he had just the person to supply it, too, but he wasn't about to tell Rodney that.


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